One of my college dreams was to be a TV news reporter. It was maybe my 2nd or 3rd major in college, and I felt “at home” as a Mass Comm (communications) major.
I wanted to be the talented, smart and pretty woman in front of the camera. I worked really hard at writing and developing interesting stories. My main professor, a recently retired TV news director, had no faith in my abilities. And honestly maybe my story writing did suck.
The professor eventually suggested that I consider my area to be behind the camera. Mid-semester I found out I was pregnant. I had not place to turn, I went for it. I lost my figure and my confidence for being in front of the camera anyway. I did a final project on a “doggie hysterectomy”. I filmed a vet doing the surgery on the dog. At one point I focused in on his face, and in his glasses you could see the refletion of his work. It was really good, and I heard after college a classmate did that type of story for a news station and won an award for it.
I finished the semester out, while still pregnant, I brought my fears to this professor. The fears of pursuing my goals as a photojournalist and being a single Mom. He told me some of his hardest working and best employees were single Moms. He said that they are so used to working hard and doing it alone at home, that they bring this work ethic to their job.
This was the beginning of seeing myself outside the box of shame I was in. The only thing I saw about myself, was “unwed mother” or “unworthy” having a kid on my own, without a spouse, surely that meant I was ‘easy’ as well. There is a difference about having unwed sex, and then being ‘caught’ at it, by getting pregnant. Anyway – –
I kept all the good of his perpective that single moms are hard working, and I kept the bad, his feedback I could not tell a story. And 17 years later I started blogging.
Blogging is storytelling. Blogging is writing. I can do this, and I will only get better as I continue to do this.
One of the things I tell people:
It’s not what happens to you, its the story you tell yourself about it.
So it’s time I tell the story, that I can tell a story. I’ve learned the power of storytelling and I’m willing to live it by changing my story.
Instead of: “I can’t”, it’s “I can”.
Got any “cants” to make “cans” . . . go for it!