Daily Archives: February 19, 2010

Turns out, I named my daughter after a consequential stranger!

I posted about Consequential Strangers, after hearing a story on NPR.  The book is great, and the concept has been very applicable to Restorative Justice.  Explaining the social convoy, and concept really draws out awesome stories.  I also made my list of 100 important people, you might want to consider giving that a try.  The person I named my daughter after, wasn’t even on that list, but all the same, he’s a consequential stranger.

I was getting ready for day two of a Circle training, and I knew that I wanted to present the importance of ALL relationships, and share the “people really matter’ consequential stranger concept.  I was mulling over this notion, answering emails and a coworker (yes I now have a coworker) asked how I named my daughter.  In total Kris Miner ADD fashion, I said “Hey that’s it, thats the story for Circle today, thanks, perfect!”  It could have been her cold medicine, it could have been me, she looked slightly confused.  I briefly explained my story.  I told the whole thing later in Circle to introduce consequential strangers.  I’ll blog the story here, a few more details than the Circle.

I got pregnant in college, a complete, unexpected shock.  I even called the 1-800 number on the pregnancy test, to let them know they were distributing a faulty product.  I had a positive test and there was no way I could be pregnant.  When the person on the phone asked if I had unprotected sex, I shot back “what’s that got to do with it”. 

Nearly 9 months later, it was the end of the semester and I was at a geography test.  Somehow I locked my keys in my car.  My apartment keys in the car, the spare set of car keys at the apartment.  I barely knew Wylie.  He was a cool guy on campus.  He was a cowboy with a great butt!  We went on one date, and shortly after I found out I was pregnant.  He was a distant friend of a friend.  Somehow after class he found out I locked my keys in my car.

He helped me out, at his own expense.  On the way to my apartment he got pulled over, his tabs were expired.  I think he mentioned that was why he wasn’t driving much.  I felt so bad.  He did his best to play down he now had a fine.  He popped off a screen, crawled down into my basement apartment.  Something at 8.5 months pregnant I would not have been able to do.

It occurred to me to remove the W, and add the K, to create Kylie.  Wylie was so original, in person and name.  I thought I created a new name.  Because of Kris, the “K” thing seemed cute, I was 23 years old.  Turns out Kylie was not the original creation I thought.

How she was named was always known to her.  When friends ask, I’ve over heard her tell a brief version of the story.

When I told the story in Circle, I shared that I don’t remember Wylie’s last name.  He doesn’t know he has a kid named after him.  I have no idea what he did with his life after college.  Yet the time he spent helping out a pregnant classmate, that act of kindness lives on and on.  People who don’t seem to matter, but really do.  Consequential Strangers.

1 Comment

Filed under Full Circle Experiences, Kris Miner, Relationships